Showing posts with label novel editing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label novel editing. Show all posts

Thursday, October 18, 2012

An editor's views on powerful writing


I hate wishy-washy words. Throw out the "to be" verbs and give me something active, something powerful.
And take "made his way." Please. I once was reading a chapter in a novel and noticed "made his way" eight times on one page and 40 times in the chapter. The protagonist didn't walk, strut or stroll. He didn't move, slide, wend or walk. He didn't even matriculate or hurry. Or stumble and fall.
He just made his way, over and over and over. Gag.
It works the same way when writers use tons of modifiers. Saturn is massive; it can't be very massive or hugely massive (yes, I'm exaggerating to make a point). A locomotive is powerful. Very, extremely and all of the modifiers in the world won't change or add to that.
If a woman is beautiful or stunning or enchanting, will a modifier make her more so?
He is certainly a wise man; or, he is a wise man. What’s the difference?
Shakespeare wasn't famous or revered because of his wordiness. He cut his writing to the core and made every word count. (And, of course, he was one heck of a writer.)
I really hate it when writers use whom all of the time. If this keeps up, Pete Townshend's band will be The Whom.
I also have problems with attribution in a novel. I can
stand exclaimed as a verb to replace said, and whispered is perfect. He whispered, and she exclaimed. Great.
But then a novelist will write, "I haven't felt right in years," Julia sniffed. Julia may have sniffed before or after she said it, but she didn't sniff it. She said it. A better way: "I haven't felt right in years," Julia said. She looked away and sniffed into a handkerchief.
I hate it when a novelist uses no attribution at all -- it's tough to tell who's saying what. And I really hate it when the novelist expects me to remember Sally, Joan, Martha and Lula Belle without a scorecard. I probably can remember Lula Belle for obvious reasons. It might help to occasionally remind us that Sally and Joan are cousins, and Martha is Sally's next-door neighbor.
A woman is pregnant, not very pregnant (I'd be tempted to say that she's hugely pregnant, though). And a one-of-a-kind diamond is unique. Very won't boost it a bit.
In fact, you can pretty much kick the word "very" out of your vocabulary and use powerful words. Mark Twain suggested that we change every “very” in our writing to “damn.” The editor will take out the damns, and the writing will be as it should be.
Smart man, that Twain. Very smart.
Oops!

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Advice for be and would-be novelists

Even long-time novelists can learn, or they need to be reminded. Here’s a quick primer on novel writing.

Don’t tell us that your lady fair is pretty or beautiful. Let us see her through your eyes. Show us the russet tresses flowing over bare shoulders, her green eyes, her wicked (or demure) smile. Or her pink, fuzzy sweaters. You're already getting visions, aren't you? And I'm just throwing out ideas.

As Antov Chekhov said so well, “Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.”

Always give the reader something to see, hear, taste, smell or feel, something to remember. An old car is better if it's green and white, if its fenders are a darker shade of green and its tires are shiny whitewalls. Or it has noxious fumes belching from the tailpipe. Do you see?

Give your writing room to breathe. Don't have pages and pages of blah, blah, blah without switching paragraphs. It's hard to read, and you're not Shakespeare. In fact, Shakespeare wouldn't have been so unkind to his readers.

You don't need attribution for every bit of dialogue, but occasionally help the reader and say who's speaking. Remind your reader who Bessie Mae and Big John Jones are. Be courteous.

Give us drama. Don't give your hero a happy childhood, a happy tour of military duty, a happy marriage and an even happier work life. Make him suffer or worry a bit. Let your reader empathize with him. Give us a reason to read your writing.

Use active verbs. Don't have your hero make his way here and there. Let him amble, stroll, bumble or slither. And occasionally use an interesting word like sumptuous or persnickety (which means placing too much emphasis on trivial or minor details).

If you’re writing action, write short, snappy sentences. If you want to put your reader to sleep (or you’re writing about a sleepy winter scene), long, flowing sentences are fine.

Let your reader laugh occasionally. Stephen King saw humor in horror and J.K. Rowling saw something funny or frightening in magic, and it worked for them. And I suspect that Raymond Chandler and Dashiell Hammett found humor in murder, too.

Remember that it’s almost impossible to come up with something new. Writers wrote about feuding families long before Shakespeare penned the story about the Montagues and the Capulets.

Don’t fall in love with long-winded monologues or soliloquies. Elmore Leonard always said that he cut out the stuff that readers skip (And, yes, readers do skip the chapter in “Moby Dick” that explains harpooning. I did.). Learn something from it.

Don’t be like Michael Douglas’s character in “Wonder Boys.” When you're done, quit writing. Then edit, edit, edit. Remember this: Your finished product is not pristine. Agents and publishers will suggest changes. So will good editors.

Listen to your editor. I became a better writer when I worked with better editors; in fact, I probably became a better editor as well.

Finally, find an agent or a publisher. The world is awaiting your book with bated breath.

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EMAIL: tgilli52@gmail.com  BLUESKY: PROFILE



BLOG ENTRIES FROM THE AUTO RACING JOURNAL
(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)
(the book of great NASCAR stories)
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